mega me

i hate to admitt this especially with the sister that i have, but tonight will be the first night in my married life that my husband has left me alone. now it is true that i have left him numberous times, but he has never left me. i will be here in my house with my children alone, all by myself. no mother to run to, because geof. still has her held captive. it has been a rough couple of days since the babes found out that dad was not going to be here on his day off and that he was going to the beach without us. jackson has even accused cor of loving work more than him. the kid would have died, being raised the way i was. no it's because daddy is always here that this is so hard for us all. even wil the biggest mamma's boy ever wanted nothing to do with me this morning. he only wanted dada, cor, truck, beach, any thing that would get him out the door with his dad. the promise of sleeping in my bed tonight is the only thing that got cor out the door without three growths attached to his legs. i love to read all you have to say, you all crack me up. jess i know the title thing really has me stumped as well. and thank you very much you can keep your stinking rain, we have enough of that crap here :). lyd i can not wait to come and see you in the circus, i just know you will make it some day. oh and jess i really do believe that anthony will miss wearing all that lovely makeup. every time he would come on stage jack would say "oh no its the boy who sings like a girl again!!". what a smart boy i have and already so good at criticizing people. (don't you all love the way i spell). brooke i had no idea it could be two years, but i did know about the whole iraq thing so i guess it would be better to have him somewhere safe and where you can visit him. i also agree that you should come home, and not all for selfish reasons. i truely believe there is nothing more stable than family. even our crazy family. do you know when he has to go? alicia i hate you everyday because i know that even though you say you are all fat and all that you are not and that you are a totally hot pregnant momma. i was having these really yucky contractions yesterday and i was like great my mom's gone, cory's leaving to the beach, i calculated my due date wrong, the ultrasound was off and i am going to have this baby all by myself. now i truely do believe i am loosing my mind. mindi i love the story of the hat and sierra's reminder. children's faith is amazing. now i will share a little story that some of you may have heard, but it is awsome and my monsters are ocupodo. now before cor and i had even talked about having this little baby the kids and i were driving with linda. jackson pipes up from the back seat that we are planning to have anohter baby sister. (now in the back of my mind i knew there was another also, but did not want to admit it to any one especially to myself.) so linda says "you know jackson even if your mom does have another baby it may not be a girl." he said, "oh yes it will, because all we have to do is pray to heavenly father that we will have a girl and we will." then when we had our ultra sound and came home to tell benny we were having a girl, she said, "i know". like duh. heavenly father loves to build our faith and especially as children when we are so teachable. i love you all, sorry i wrote so much. ..........me