mom's sweet email to patti

patti, i will leave for home sat. and pray i can make flights. i love you. i miss you and your family. you have been so good so strong through all of this.  an example of what you believe. my heart aches for you. what a love story you have had together--you were truly best friends.  what can i say or do that will help. how bout when you are not feeling like the perfect example you call me and go ahead and rant! i promise to listen to it all-forget the bad-remember the good-still love you-never tell anyone else-almost never give advise and never think worse of you. God never gives us more than we can handle--my word what a woman you are that He thinks you can handle this. twins alone would be enough for most.
memories of someone you have lost are like reading the best chapters of a favorite book. you and rob and your family have been in a lot of my favorite chapters. sunday dinners, the absolute chaos with all of us there and the family home evenings afterwards. the night we all told how we met and fell in love. rob said you kept trying to line him up with someone. finally he told you, "but i don't want to go out with her. i want to date you!"  the night we watched "charlie" and everyone lost it in spite of our best efforts.
rob teaching seminary and even bringing visual aids. he always talked about "sister epperson." how much he loved his class and how much they loved him.
watching you all play soccer and dang i missed the "edwardian rescue."  rob was one of the few men that could beat meags in a leg wrestle.
when i loaned rob "fire and the covenant" i remember him telling us about when he got to the part where they were climbing rocky ridge. he said he was trying so hard to hold back when he realized it was dark-he was alone in the car-no one would see him so he let it all out and bawled like a baby.
the sunday night i stopped by your home after i had been to see scott.  i told him as dire as his circumstances were i would rather be where the two of you were with your your heads on straight--your marriage, family, support of the ward, your testimonies and understanding of the gospel. that i loved you both. what a good man he was. he took my hand told me at some point that day he had to stop bawling, gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me thank you.
i remember the pioneer trek. from the beginning i had been asking that you be called as ma and pa. you had a vacation planned that just was not coming together, funny thing. you were so good with your little family. the last day of the trek when the boys made that silent pull up the hill. nothing had been a surprise till then because no one knew. i asked the stake pres. for permission to do it. i had prayed that the kids would feel the spirit. your boys were the first handcart up the hill. they rounded the corner and saw the girls lined up on either side of the trail singing "come, come ye saints." i watched rob's face contort with the effort to control his emotions. he took off his hat held it in front of his face and bowed his head. what i had prayed for happened-they felt the reverence-they were walking sacred ground. rob had set the standard. i talked to him about it later. he said as he climbed the hill and heard the singing all he wanted was to see you!
he has climbed his hill, fought valiantly his fight. he fought as hard as he could to let you know he really wanted to be here with you and your children. he is such a good man. like lehi he has found the tree of life and is now beckoning his family on. remember when meagan had her little panic attack last summer and wilohm knelt over the top of her, put his hands on her shoulders and said, "just bweeve mom, rob says just bweeve deep!" dang he was funny. the kids loved him. they love you. we just have to keep breething.
i don't know how people do this without the gospel no wonder mens heart fail them. you have the gift of the comforter. what a miracle that is. i am so grateful for the blessings of the gospel in my life.  it would just be too grim without it.
love you, le anne