I'm so sorry that I'm sick

I woke up this morning and I still had an upset stomach. It took me a minute to remember what I had been worrying about. I'm so sorry Adam and Mindi. Kev thinks I'm nuts because I started crying twice last night just thinking about it. I'm a jerk. I don't know what else to say other than Adam if you stay mad at me forever I don't know what I'll do. The other day I was thinking about the relationships that mean the most to me and they are all with members of my family. I love you more than anything and feel like a complete idiot that you worked so hard to put this together and everyone honked you out. PLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME! I'm so sorry. I also assume that you think my reasons for not coming are completely retarded, but I just feel like I still don't know what the crap I'm doing with Chloe. Everyday I think about what a bad mom I am. I have like less than no control of Chloe around my sisters and I didn't want to create a babysitting weekend for them. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you guys. Alicia
p.s. If the phrase "when you live your dreams you'll find des-ti-ny is written in your heart" means anything to anyone, I have you're Barbie and am holding her for a $2 randsom.